Kids say funniest things....
>TEACHER: Why are you late?
>WEBSTER: Because of the sign.
>TEACHER: What sign?
>WEBSTER: The one that says, "School Ahead, Go Slow."
>*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*
>TEACHER: John, how do you spell "crocodile"?
>JOHN: "K-R-O-K-O-D-A-I-L"
>TEACHER: No, that's wrong
>JOHN: Maybe it's wrong, but you ask me how I spell it!
>*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*
>TEACHER: What is the chemical formula for water?
>SARAH: "HIJKLMNO"!! >TEACHER: What are you talking about?
>SARAH: Yesterday you said it's H to O!
>*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*
>TEACHER: George, go to the map and find North America.
>GEORGE: Here it is!
>TEACHER: Correct. Now, class, who discovered America?
>CLASS: George!
>*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*
>TEACHER: Willy, name one important thing we have today that we
>didn't have ten years ago. WILLY: Me!
>*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*
>TEACHER: Tommy, why do you always get so dirty?
>TOMMY: Well, I'm a lot closer to the ground then you are.
>*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*
>SILVIA: Dad, can you write in the dark?
>FATHER: I think so. What do you want me to write?
>SILVIA: Your name on this report card.
>*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*
>TEACHER: Ellen, give me a sentence starting with "I".
>ELLEN: I is...
>TEACHER: No, Ellen. Always say, "I am."
>ELLEN: All right... "I am the ninth letter of the alphabet."
>*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*
>Teacher: "Can anybody give an example of COINCIDENCE?"
>Johnny: "Sir, my Mother and Father got married on the sameday sametime."
>*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*
>Teacher: "George Washington not only chopped down his father's Cherry tree, but also admitted doing it.Now do you know why his father didn't punish him?"
>Johnny: "Because George still had the axe in his hand."
>*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*
>Teacher: Now, Sam, tell me frankly do you say prayers before eating?
>Sam: No sir, I don't have to, my mom is a good cook.
>*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*
>Teacher: Desmond, your composition on "My Dog" is exactly the same as your brother's. Did u copy his?
>Desmond: No, teacher, it's the same dog!
>*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*
>Teacher: What do you call a person who keeps on talking when people
>are no longer interested?
>Pupil: A teacher.
>TEACHER: Why are you late?
>WEBSTER: Because of the sign.
>TEACHER: What sign?
>WEBSTER: The one that says, "School Ahead, Go Slow."
>*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*
>TEACHER: John, how do you spell "crocodile"?
>JOHN: "K-R-O-K-O-D-A-I-L"
>TEACHER: No, that's wrong
>JOHN: Maybe it's wrong, but you ask me how I spell it!
>*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*
>TEACHER: What is the chemical formula for water?
>SARAH: "HIJKLMNO"!! >TEACHER: What are you talking about?
>SARAH: Yesterday you said it's H to O!
>*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*
>TEACHER: George, go to the map and find North America.
>GEORGE: Here it is!
>TEACHER: Correct. Now, class, who discovered America?
>CLASS: George!
>*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*
>TEACHER: Willy, name one important thing we have today that we
>didn't have ten years ago. WILLY: Me!
>*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*
>TEACHER: Tommy, why do you always get so dirty?
>TOMMY: Well, I'm a lot closer to the ground then you are.
>*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*
>SILVIA: Dad, can you write in the dark?
>FATHER: I think so. What do you want me to write?
>SILVIA: Your name on this report card.
>*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*
>TEACHER: Ellen, give me a sentence starting with "I".
>ELLEN: I is...
>TEACHER: No, Ellen. Always say, "I am."
>ELLEN: All right... "I am the ninth letter of the alphabet."
>*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*
>Teacher: "Can anybody give an example of COINCIDENCE?"
>Johnny: "Sir, my Mother and Father got married on the sameday sametime."
>*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*
>Teacher: "George Washington not only chopped down his father's Cherry tree, but also admitted doing it.Now do you know why his father didn't punish him?"
>Johnny: "Because George still had the axe in his hand."
>*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*
>Teacher: Now, Sam, tell me frankly do you say prayers before eating?
>Sam: No sir, I don't have to, my mom is a good cook.
>*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*
>Teacher: Desmond, your composition on "My Dog" is exactly the same as your brother's. Did u copy his?
>Desmond: No, teacher, it's the same dog!
>*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*
>Teacher: What do you call a person who keeps on talking when people
>are no longer interested?
>Pupil: A teacher.